And, maybe you don’t need to either…
Let me explain:
I feel like homes are meant to be lived in fully & beautifully, and if you cover that up by cleaning every little thing every day, I feel like it may detract from the living that’s done there.
Now, I know we all choose to keep our spaces differently, and I get that…I also get that there is a point where mess tips the scale and becomes unsafe, utter chaos.
But, most of us don’t reside there, most of us reside in the world of a life well lived & a home well lived in.
As I type, the frying pan from last night’s dinner is still soaking in my sink, there are painting supplies on my table, and my reading nook is really the move-in catch all…
And, I won’t apologize for that.
I spent the day working, and the evening with my sisters and friends: there was laughter, there were inside jokes…there was the moment when I squealed at the baby elephant (I really love elephants)…
My home is for making memories. For living my beautifully messy life. And, I won’t apologize for it.
Are you a young, stay at home mom feeling guilty that you can’t keep everything clean? Or a working mom trying to balance everything? My guess is, you spent precious time with the kiddos. Don’t apologize for that. Those cheerios in the couch and the toys littering the floor? Those are your home’s battle scars, the beautiful sign of life within the walls of your home.
Are you a single (young or more mature) person, making your way in the world? Trying to create something lovely around you? Have the remnants of a hobby strewn about? Or the makings of a great party? It’s the tell-tale sign of life well lived.
The great thing, we have the choice, when we invite people in. We can apologize for our space, or welcome others in openly.
Yet, when we apologize, what are we saying:
I’m sorry for living…I’m sorry for having interests…I’m sorry for spending time making memories…I’m sorry for playing with my kids…I’m sorry for working hard, then allowing myself time to relax rather than clean…I’m sorry that my hobby takes up space…I’m sorry I can’t be perfect all the time…I’m sorry you have to see my mess…
At the root, may be fear of judgement, or a lack of trust. But, when we welcome others without apology, we say:
Welcome to my mess…Welcome to the reality of my world…Let me show you the beauty of my life…I trust you here in my mess…I have a beautiful, full life…I am comfortable with myself & with those I let in…We can have fun without fear…This is a place for relationships…
We get to choose how we decide to bring others in. With an invitation and smile, or with an apology & trepidation.
So, I won’t apologize for the mail pile on my counter, the still as yet to be unpacked boxes in my living room, or the laundry that hasn’t been put away…
I’ve been busy. Connecting with my clients, making big decisions about work, paying my bills, creating pieces of art for my new home, and spending glorious time with my family (as well as alone time).
And, I applaud you for your well lived life, too. You young (or more mature) single, making it all work. Or the moms/dads (both stay-at-home & working), letting their kids live & making the most of that time.
I hope you too can learn not to apologize for your living space.
A Tuesday @ 10 post…this week, Choice.
Author Candice Jenee’ 